I Want a Haiku
by jadefuji
Summary: All I had so far were endless beginnings. ToushiSouji Sapppy


I Want a Haiku

_oOo_

"I want a haiku, Toshi!" Souji begged his Vice Commander, while he watched him silently apply the mint vaseline on his chest. Souji cringed, biting his lower lip preventing a cough from escaping. It was painful when he coughed and he did not want to feel the dull pain again. The bruises on his chest ached, his ribcage felt like iron talons with bladed tips. He did not suffer any broken bones but the heavy assault on his chest when he was pinned to the ground bruised his chest muscles.

Toshi carefully applied the ointment so as not to cause too much discomfort, keeping a watchful eye on Souji's facial reaction as he slowly rub down every inch of his lover's upper body.

_From Toshi to Souji:_

"_When I stand alone,  
Without you next to my side  
I'm cold and empty."_

Souji smiled after hearing Toshi's response to his request. His eyes closed. He smiled. Slowly, he could feel himself relaxing to the soothing smell of the mint vaseline. His chest was slowly relieved of the dull ache and his breathing was not as rugged and heavy. The herbal medicine Toshi mixed with his evening tea did the trick.

"Thank you for taking care of me Toshi." Lavender eyes gazed at the Vice Commander. Pale cold hands held Toshi's warm big ones. Souji kissed each palm and held them both close to his chest. Tears rimmed Souji's closed eyes and trickled down his cheeks. His heart was filled with such overwhelming emotions, he failed to keep inside. He loved his Vice Commander so much and he was so thankful for his safety.

Toshi, however, felt nothing but hate for himself as he watched Souji suffer in pain. He blamed himself for his absence and he hated himself for coming out of this assault unscathed.

_From Toshi to Souji: _

"_My heart calls one name,  
Of someone with purple eyes,  
With smiles meant for me."_

Toshi took Souji's hand and kissed them as well. Lacing their hands together, Toshi smiled at his lover. He watched in silence, he kept vigil night after night; making sure Souji was comfortable. It's been three days and Souji was not showing any signs of getting better. His pale skin has turned more pallid and gray, his chest stained with black bruises all over and the swelling in his chest cavities have not gone down.

Toshi stayed calm and did not show any sign of worries. He was confident of his lover's recovery and provided him with the assuring smiles, his dry humor and lame haikus when he asked for it.

"_My Souji_." Toshi silently called his name like a prayer. He cannot be without him in his life, he loved Souji since the first time they met. Souji was nine when he joined the Shinsengumi, Toshi was sixteen. He remembered how he constantly teased and called him a puppy. He remembered how Souji constantly cried for being called as such. But Souji knew how to get him back and he did so with a vengeance. Souji was a gifted swordsman by heart and a very skillful one. He became Souji's sparring partner and since then a friendship grew. Toshi climbed in rank and he took Souji with him. He only trusted Souji next to him and he did not want anyone else protecting Souji but himself.

Toshi took out his pipe from his sleeve pocket and crushed some tobacco. He pushed the sliding door open before lighting his pipe, this way he kept the smoke out of Souji's room. He watched the cold surrounding of the camp, puffing out smoke as he enjoyed the tranquility underneath the silvery aura of the late autumn moon. He shared beautiful quiet evenings with Souji in the past. He recalled the nights when they walked under the shadows of the full moon; the endless nights when they just talked and dreamed about a life they would share together in the future. And there were those moments of intimacy and passion that constantly blaze his memory. But this war will not end soon and Souji will be called back to active duty, once he's healed.

Toshi closed his eyes. His frustration over the entire situation elevated his anger. He is Vice Commander of the Shinsengumi and he is bound to his responsibility. But his love for Souji is above anything else and it is his duty to protect him, the one he truly loves.

"Toshi?" Souji coughed violently, he sat up quickly; once again pain darted sharply all over this chest. Toshi did not waste anytime and was right next to Souji after he discarded his smoking pipe.

"Shhh…I am right here Souji." Toshi rubbed his back, attempting to relieve him of his cough.

He poured more tea for him and added the medicine. "Drink Souji, this will help you with the pain." Souji sipped the tea as instructed and his eyes smiled with thanks.

Toshi held him tight, keeping him warm. He closed his eyes, holding on to his composure, he did not want Souji to see him break. He must be strong for him.

"I will not allow any more harm come your way, Souji." Toshi declared. " No more wishful thinking or looking to the future for things _we_ want someday. I want us now. All we wish for endlessly, a beginning of a life together. I don't want to wish for it no more, I want _us_ to start now."

_From Toshi to Souji: _

"_Souji Okita.  
Toshizo Hijikata  
Two souls with one love."_

Happy tears trickled down Souji's cheeks, after hearing his lover's commitment. He never thought Toshi could ever utter those words, and with a nod Souji accepted. _  
_

_From Souji to Toshi:_

"_My promise to you_  
_To keep you safe in my heart_  
_And life filled with love."_

"Souji." Toshi smiled at his petite lover. "Listen to you, your haiku is just as bad as mine." Toshi chuckled after seeing Souji pout. "I love it because you made it for me."

"Just like all the haikus you wrote in the past. It was all for me." Souji declared with a smile.  
"I knew, that's why I always steal your collection. I wanted to read it all the time. Thank you for thinking of me all the time."

_To Toshi and Souji: _

"_A kiss shared and an embrace,  
finds happy endings  
for your endless beginnings."_

_oOo_


End file.
